只想賺錢沒有想法的人生 大學,進去半年,出來了。 - 老師
By Jack
at 2010-06-22T03:43
at 2010-06-22T03:43
Table of Contents
在下是79年次的學生,應屆來說今年應該是大一升大二的時候。
原本唸的學校是號稱「全台灣最便宜的大學」。在國高中階段所補的習
,就是為了以後能唸公立學校,能減輕爸媽的負擔。我真的不想花爸媽
太多錢讓我唸書,從小看著爸媽辛苦工作到大,我是這麼想的。
然而,進去這間大學,其實也不只是為了省錢,也有其他不純的理
由〈感情問題,就不詳述。〉,然而,在大一開學沒多久,感情方面的
誤會等等轉變,我開始埋怨,也迷失了進這所大學的理由,程式也打不
出來,自己又不想抄別人的作業,作業交不出來,成績就直直落下,讀
資訊的學生,程式設計被當掉,我開始懷疑我是不是唸錯科系。
大一下,程式設計的課程加重,一門c#,我認真上課沒睡覺,可
是答不出問題,老師就說我上課不認真,作業還是打不出來,老師送我
期中預警單,加上上學期的程式設計被當,下學期被擋修,感覺越唸越
差。家裡到學校要花一個鐘頭,自己又越來越沒動力,漸漸的,早上容
易遲到,更嚴重,我開始睡到中午,下午才去學校上課,最後,連微積
分期中考都睡過頭沒考到,自己被三二的命運可想而知。
我在今年五月份去學校辦理休學,然而我卻沒有想在回去唸的想法
,報名了大學指定科目考試,可是自己又沒準備多少,老是以自己在補
習班當國中班導,每週一二三五六晚上要去補習班打85/hr的工作,學
長說我在浪費時間,可是去打工我覺得照顧那些國三生的意義比我多領
10/hr來的有意義吧?,即使他們考完之後不會哭著圍繞在我身邊,暑假
大玩特玩也不會找我一起,so what?我覺得能教給他們一些事
情,一些當初沒有人教我的事情,做這類的事情讓我覺得很充實。
然而,隨著他們考試的時間漸漸逼近,我能做的就只是幫忙整理考卷,
影印,改考卷,打掃,到最後,我能跟他們談話的時間幾乎已經沒了,
剩下的只有做不完的雜事,機械性,重複性,可能是我自己太沒耐性了
吧,常常會想起學長說的那些話,常常思索現在繼續做這份打工的意義
何在起初是想回去幫高中認識的補習班老師,途中是為了能幫到這群國
三的學生,現在我唸到三二了,應該要重新考大學的時候,我為什麼還
在做這份工作而不是把時間拿去唸指考的書?
現在離指考剩下八天,我沒有辦法期待我在沒有唸書的情況下能考
多好,更重要的,我不知道不念資訊之後,接下來我應該要選什麼來唸
,考名校?考好科系?公立?總覺得現在很迷茫,是我在逃避唸書?還
是我在逃避責任?我還是要考大學,畢竟爸媽已經說了這次是最後一次
,明年學測,所以遲早要上大學,可是,想不出來該怎麼走‧....
懇請各位前輩能夠給點建議,感激不盡。
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老師
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